Hogwarts is real!
by savemyunicornclarence
Summary: Charlie thought she was a regular girl. Certainly she had her insane moments, but doesn't everyone? Her mother was bailing her out of jail, when an owl appeared. She was all like WTF? Now, her journey through the world of Harry Potter will come to life. She will make friends and enemies, and she might just meet the guy of her dreams at Hogwarts. Beta Reader: Hope Lions


I was an ordinary girl. A bit eccentric but with no talents except to screw myself over. Black hair. Brown eyes. Pale skin. Looked like death rolled over and slathered me in mud. I nodded. No one would come to like me. I hated myself. I hated that I pitied myself for being friendless. I said to myself: "This time, Charlie, you're going to march right up to that new, hot exchange student and make friends." I pumped my fist in the air, determined to make my first friend. I crouched low and scuttled behind a bush. I peeked through the leaves – damn was it hard to see through leaves – and waited for him to cross the sidewalk. I salivated, delighted to be able to see his cute bum. Did I want to bite that fine piece of ass? Yes, I was not ashamed to admit it. I will never be ashamed to creepily admire the hotness that surrounds my everyday life.

Hours passed. I sat in the bush waiting for my true love to show up, but he never came. Dejected I stood up and brushed my hair back into a ponytail.

"Mommy, a girl is in the bushes." A little boy points at me. His green eyes stare at me with wide eyes. I grinned and shushed him. _Don't tell my secret, little boy. _He screamed and toddled away. His chubby legs churned and kicked up dirt to get to his mother. "MOMMY! She's creep!"

"Matt, don't be ridiculous! There. Is. No. Girl. In. The. Bushes." I was entangling myself when I looked up to meet eyes with the mother. She dropped her cellphone. I waved at her with a grin.

"What's up? I'm not being creepy. I was just … um, looking for my cat." I grinned at her and gave her a thumbs up. The world hated me. Gravity decided to drag me down into the pits of hell at that point. I crashed to the ground, landing on my back.

"Fucking narwhals pretzels sticks on rye! I hate gravity. I fucking defy gravity." I punched the sidewalk. I glared at the ground. "Don't pretend like you don't know what I am talking about? The ground absolutely worships me, but it is a one-sided fucking relationship!" I punched the ground again to impale my hatred at the universe. I pushed myself up and kicked at the tree. I sensed that the mother and child were scampering off, but did I care? NO! "Don't be so high and mighty, Mr. Tree! You don't understand my pains." I pointed to a bruise forming on my knee. "That's from being pushed – not my fault, but gravity was a bitch." Bruise on my foot. "How did that get here?" Bruise on my elbow. "Some bitch slut was asking for it. How was I supposed to know that I have poor aim?" I glared at my shoes. "The locker appeared out of nowhere!" I exploded and was starting to kick the tree again, when a hand grabbed my ankle.

OK, pause right here. If a stranger's hand grabbed your ankle, isn't it instinct to kick out in between the legs? If the target is male, good for you on your aim. But then run. If target is female, then it would still hurt like a bitch, right?

I leaned against the concrete wall. Jail. I, Charlie Millington, was in jail! I banged my head against the wall. I crossed my arms and started pacing. It was what I do when I get anxious. I wasn't worried about school finding out because they were looking for a reasonable excuse to expel me. I was failing all my classes anyways! What I was scared of was my brother finding out. I rubbed my face and punched the wall.

"Lady, calm down. No need to punch anything." The police officer held his hands up and was approaching me slowly.

"Fuck you, Officer." I punched the wall again. I threw my shoulders back and barked out a laugh. "You can't touch me! I'm Dean fucking Winchester. I'm an Aquarius, I enjoy sunsets, long walks on the beach, and frisky women."

"So you're a lesbian?"

"No!" I planted my hands on my hips and rolled my eyes. "I am straight." I looked at the dingy ceiling and frowned. I had one hazy memory when I got drunk once. It involved Georgina and … My brain stopped me from remembering any further. "OK," I shrugged. "Only when I am really," I trailed off. I was just going to admit to a police officer that I drank alcohol under age. I glared at him. His blue eyes twinkled with amusement.

"What were you going to say?"

"Nothing," I walked back to the dirty mattress and sat down. I didn't look at the police officer. I didn't think of anything. I was going to confess all of my sins! I shook my head. I would end up going to some religious prison for all of my sins! I grinned at the wall and smirked. Boy, did I want to confess my sins though! I would relish the disgust on that officer's face. I chuckled and patted my back. Was I a slightly sick soul who enjoyed seeing others uncomfortable? Yes. I did. It gave me great comforts really.

I freed myself from my thoughts when I heard the lock twisting. "You're free to go, Ms. Millington." He guided me down the hallway. "If you are caught talking to a tree again, though," he warned me. I waggled my eyebrows at him and grinned.

"What? Throw me in a mental hospital?" I laughed. "I always wanted to go to one. Free drugs." His eyes flickered with uncertainty. He cleared his throat and walked me to the lobby area.

I snickered at the officer but stopped. Hold on. Was that my mother in the police station?! "Oh my God! Mother, honestly, you didn't have to tear yourself away from the Church. I am perfectly capable of walking myself home."

She only glared at me. "What were you doing in the bushes?"

"I was waiting for a future friend, but he never showed up." She stared at me with her mouth moving like a fish. "Honestly, I was just ranting about gravity. I don't know I ended up in jail."

"You reacted violently when a police officer showed up to ask if you were OK. A little boy and his mother were concerned."

"There's no need for concern, though!" I threw my hands in the air. Why could no one ever see what I see? Why could no one hear what I hear? "The tree was OK with what I was doing."

Mother froze. Her eyes bore into mine as if they were searching for something. "Get in the car now. I am going to deal with this, then we're going to have a talk." I sighed and pushed through the doors. I shivered at the cold winds. I trudged towards the car, got into the car, and plopped down in the passenger seat. I pushed my boots against the windshield hoping it would break. I stopped though, when I saw an owl peck at the window.

"What the hell?" I rolled down the window. "What the fuck is an owl doing here?" The owl hooted softly and stuck out its leg. I eyed it warily, wondering if it would give me any diseases. I shrugged and grabbed the parchment tied to its leg. It hooted again and flew off. I watched it disappear into the sky. Am I being pranked right now? I looked around for a camera and someone to jump out, but there was no one. I opened the parchment.

I stared.

And stared.

"What the fuck? A letter from Hogwartz? Harry Potter is real? I'm so confused."


End file.
